Truthfully, I have read and reread your comments and they have eased my heart. Today was the viewing and I am glad that I managed to stay relatively calm. As a perfectionist I struggle especially over little things. I stress over stuff that probably doesn't matter to others, but I can't help myself. At every funeral that I have been too, we always send floral sprays, and yes they do tend to be a little more expensive, but I started out by giving the bigger sprays and I can't not give a smaller one for fear of why is Johnny and Donna's flowers small, they gave Lois such a beautiful arrangement. Well, I ordered a spray the same size as I always get, yet when we were at the funeral home today, I looked for mine, mine are normally big and easy to see. Friends, I was disappointed because when I finally found mine, it was very small and not what I had ordered. OK, to me that was a horrible slap to my already battered soul. Of course I got upset, I cried, I wanted to scream, plus they forgot the bird. I always add a bird, it's my way that I envision of sending love to my loved one by the wings of God's tiny angels.
Johnny tells me it's no big deal, but truthfully and emotionally it matters to me. I can't help that I want everything I do to have meaning. Even my flowers. Am I wrong for wanting that? It's not that my flowers are the biggest, because they are not, that is not the issue. If the florist cannot make what I have ordered, they run out of flowers, they have a phone number to call the client to let them know of change instead of finding out too late at the funeral home. My florist that I used to use was the best, I miss her dearly, she passed away and the family closed the business. So I used someone unknown. I will not use them again. Tomorrow I will walk around and pick the spray I like best and find out who they used.
What has happened to today's businesses? They have all lost the meaning of doing a good job, service, etc. It saddens me because I can't afford to have another floral spray made. I know Uncle Charles doesn't care, but I care about what Aunt Yvonne and Selena think. Help me Lord not to worry over things that shouldn't matter. Pray for me friends, because my heart is not a happy heart concerning the florist. (Plus Lord, help me to find a better florist!)
Whew! And I still have tomorrow to get thru. I pray Lord, that I don't have to do this again anytime soon. Thank you. Amen.
Now, I have to go iron everyone's dress shirts and pants, shine up shoes and dig out pantyhose.(I hate wearing pantyhose!)
Hugs my friends,
I'm sorry Lord that I'm picky! I'll try harder to do better.